Lore

New Employee Spotlight: Bennett Coleman

Say hello to Bennett Coleman, the newest member of the BI team. He’s a designer/developer/photographer and all around swell guy. He’s jumped right into the middle of the double-dutch style madness here and is cranking on a seriously cool design for as-of-now secret client as I write this. Stay tuned for details on that. In the meantime, we invite you to get to know him through our very rigorous questionnaire.

What are your nicknames?
When I was a kid, I really wanted to be called “Speedy.” Although I thought I ran way faster than I actually did, the nickname unfortunately never really stuck.

What would be the title of your autobiography?
Bennett Coleman: The Story of a Constant Cycle of Coffee and Beer.

If you could have any super power, what would it be and why?
I’d have the ability to immediately download any kind of knowledge I’d ever need.
Example 1: A man falls down and has a medical emergency, I could download the knowledge to diagnose and treat him until paramedics arrived. Example 2: If I flew to Italy, I could download the entire Italian language and speak fluently to all the locals.

Would you rather be a tiny elephant or a giant hamster?
Giant hamster all the way. Only because I’ve never heard anyone say, “Oh my god, a giant hamster” in any other way than extreme excitement!

What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?
Mechanically separated meat. In a can. I don’t wanna talk about it, it was the worst day of my life.

If you were a cupcake, what flavor would you be?
I’d be a vanilla cupcake with chocolate frosting and a chocolate mousse filling. There’s no existential meaning in that combination, those are just delicious!

What celebrity do people think you look like?
I feel like I could be Ryan Gosling’s stunt double…if his character was a nerdy, younger, chubbier version of himself.

When you were 6 years old, what did you want to be when you grew up?
I was going to be a pitcher for the Atlanta Braves. I used to throw balled up socks into my dryer with a full count, two outs, up by one, and the bottom of the ninth. I had many saves on my record.

What was your favorite toy as a child?
I LOVED Transformers! I had a ton of them and I loved seeing how quickly I could transform a line of them from non-threatening vehicles to bad ass super robots!

What would you like to be famous for?
I wouldn’t mind being a famous musician. I’ve always loved music, and I think it’d be fun to travel around playing shows and meeting fans…sans the cocaine addiction.

What one food do you wish had zero calories?
Dunkin Donuts Boston Cream doughnuts. I could plow through a bakers dozen of those bad boys in one sitting.

If you were a Crayola crayon, what color would you be?
Bad Ass Blue. Blue is my favorite color and, let’s face it, I’m a little bit of a bad ass. 😉

What’s your Smurf name?
Preppy Smurf. I’d dress well and have cool Smurf hair and the Smurfettes would love me!

If you could only drink one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
Starbucks’ coffee menu. Lattes, Americanos, Iced Coffees…I have a bit of an addiction.

What is your theme song?
Aloe Blacc’s “The Man.” “Go ahead and tell everybody, I’m the man, I’m the man, I’m the man…” C’mon, that song was written for me!

If your house was burning down, what’s the one thing you would save?
My Taylor acoustic guitar. I’ve had her since my Freshmen year in college. It’s one of my proudest possessions.

Which cartoon character would you most like to switch lives with?
Fry from “Futurama.” It’s not a traditional cartoon, but I feel like I can relate to his character. He’s a carefree, easy-going, hopeless romantic who accidentally fell asleep in a cryogenic chamber and woke up in the year 3000. Plus, he’s best friends with an alcoholic robot.

If you were on death row, what would your last meal be?
A 26 oz Porterhouse with a loaded baked potato and bacon-wrapped asparagus. Dessert would be a brownie ice cream sundae with chocolate syrup and crushed almonds.

If you were to write a self-help book, what would the topic be?
I’d love to help people find their passion in life. I get excited talking to young college graduates. I like helping them find a way to break into their careers.

If you could witness any historical event, what would you want to see?
I’d love to witness firsthand the first trip to the moon, preferably from the space shuttle with the astronauts. But huddled around the TV with my family witnessing history would be pretty cool too!